6:30 am – alarm goes off, I promptly get my ass out of bed, shove a progesterone suppository up my ass, swallow a vitamin, get back to bed, all in a 3-minute time. Usually, I fall asleep.
7:00 am – alarm goes off. Press snooze. And snooze. And snooze. Finally, I drag myself to the washroom. I am tired. I am sleepy. I promise myself I will go to bed earlier today. I am so bloated that going to the washroom as an excruciating embarrassment, the sounds I am making! DH is good about never commenting on it.
7:30 am – wondering what the hell should I wear to conceal my bloated bump. After dressing, spend some time in front of the mirror, changing poses, straightening shoulders and sticking out my significantly enlarged boobs in attempt to make the bump look smaller (relative to boobs) or vanish. No such luck.
8:00 am – I leave for work. Once again, I worry over not having nausea. I secretly squeeze my breasts while in streetcar, making sure they’re still sore. Making sure I’m still pregnant. Although that might be all progesterone’s work.
9:00 am – I start my work day. Unbelievably tired. I now drink sweetened tea – I can’t stand the taste of unsweetened green tea anymore, for some reason. I sadly count the resulting increase in calorie intake.
10 am – I already am hungry. Again. Oatmeal in a cup time. But I am not tired and sleepy, finally! Every now and then I secretly stroke my belly and talk to my blueberry in my head.
12 pm - lunch is getting bigger every week. Or else I get hungry like an hour later.
3 pm – my head gets heavy, there is budding headache building up, I am exhausted. It feels like it is 3 am, not 3 pm. My real work day is 10 am – 3 pm, minus lunch. All other time I struggle with exhaustion. Sometimes I wanna cry – so tired I feel. Looking at computer screen is pure torture, my eyes hurt, my brain pulses. I have to time my washroom visits so that there’s no one there to overhear the cacophony I produce.
5 pm – headache settled in, I throw myself into a streetcar, head home, and spend a couple of hours planted on a couch, reading blogs, emails, and forums. I am incapable to do anything at all. Let the dishes pile up, let the laundry accumulate to Himalaya mountains proportions… I couldn’t care less.
7:30 pm – headache lifts off, feel more energetic and serene. I have dinner, light dinner. I plan my evening water intake so as not to have to wake up in the middle of the night to go pee. DH comes home, kisses belly, talks to it a bit.
10 pm – double-progesterone, vitamin, get in bed, read. Rub my belly, think of my blueberry, talk to it in my head.
11 pm – lights off. The tossing and turning begins. My boobs are sore, my stomach is bloated, various muscles and bones are sore, I am generally uncomfortable. Often I have to get up and use the washroom – that’s progesterone at work for you. Night time lullaby for DH’s ears *sigh*
4:30 am – no matter what I do, I still usually wake up to pee. So annoying. Another toss’n'turn session ensues.
6:30 am – repetition of the previous day…