Timothy is Growing Up too Fast

26 Jul

A week ago, we started solids. At first it was rice cereal, then we added oat cereal. And then a couple of days ago Timothy farted and I went: ewwwwww!

No more sweet-smelling breastfed baby.

As my hubby said, Timothy became a man. And started to smell like one.

Sigh.

I always felt too attached to breastfeeding. I was freaking out big time when my milk supply wasn’t able to keep up with my giant of a baby (when he was 3 weeks old). I was HYSTERICAL, bawling when my hubby gave my hungry baby a bottle of formula. I refused to even watch. I felt betrayed. A failure. I knew that once you start supplementing, it’s all down the hill from there – the more other substances you give (milk, water, formula – whatever) – the less milk your body will produce, getting the signal that this is all your baby needs.

And then I grit my teeth and fought for it. I nursed almost non-stop. There was one day when Timothy spent 6 hours attached to my boobs (with an occasional bathroom break for me). That way he was stimulating the boob AND not crying of hunger. I pumped for 15-20 minutes each boob after each feeding. It felt like all I did was nurse or pump. And we came through it. My milk became plentiful and Timothy only ever had 2 small formula bottles in his whole life. I am very proud of myself.

And then once we started approaching the 5-6 month threshold, I started getting apprehensive all over again. Feeling sad that Timothy is not gonna need me all the time any longer, getting part of his nutrients from solids. The nursing sessions – which now became so easy, cuddly, companionable and short – further apart, shorter. To eventually disappear altogether in a few months.

I feel sad that this chapter is getting over.

I am happy that he’s growing. I am proud of his achievements. I am proud he has such a great appetite and eats his cereals so well, practically wrestling the spoon out of my hand.

But I can’t help feeling sad, feeling that the time is slipping though my fingers, feeling that next thing I know he will be packing for college…

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5 Responses to “Timothy is Growing Up too Fast”

  1. Mrs FF July 26, 2012 at 10:20 AM #

    YAY!!! Timothy really is growing up too fast. Next thing you’ll tell us he is starting Pre-School 😉

    • zygotta July 28, 2012 at 10:45 AM #

      I hope not that fast 🙂

  2. BleedingTulip July 26, 2012 at 8:21 PM #

    It’s easy to impatiently wait for the future, or long for the past. But the best thing we can do is enjoy what we have while we have it. Try not to stress about the end of nursing (or college) before the time has come. I am sorry you’re struggling with his new transition. 😦

  3. Nikki July 26, 2012 at 9:58 PM #

    It is very difficult as they leave the varying stages. I’ve always considered getting teeth (and not seeing that gummy smile anymore) to be a big one. But just remember: wonderful things come with new experiences 🙂

  4. Sam July 27, 2012 at 9:28 AM #

    They really do grow way too quickly honey – relish every moment, before you know it you’ll be lamenting these early days.

    xx

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